Someone saw a pair of mandarin ducks in the pond, so they ran up and said, “Don’t be so stupid to be with it every day, you see it doesn’t get a marriage certificate with you.”
Who knows, mandarin duck said in reverse: You people are really strange, it doesn’t matter if you get a certificate or not, it catches fish for me every day, isn’t this more than proof?
Of course, this is just a joke. When we fall in love, most of the time we still have a goal of getting married. If you are not an unmarried person, it is very important to identify whether the other party is suitable for marriage as soon as possible, because no one wants to waste their youth in vain.
The following five types of people are likely to be unsuitable for marriage:
People who always want manipulate each other
There is a kind of person who always wants to control you when he is with you, always wants to tell you what to do. For example, “you should go to bed early and get up early”, “you should lose weight and exercise more”, “you should go home early after get off work and don’t go out to play”, “you should have less contact with xxx”.
It sounds like these actions are all for your own good, but it actually shows that in his heart, you are not the person he really wants in his heart.
I have a friend who is very interesting. He has a cat, but he always complains that his cat is too cold, and he will not greet him every time he comes home, nor will he be happy to let him touch or accompany him play.
So I asked him: Then why don’t you just keep a dog?
Then he did get a dog, and such complaints were never heard again.
In love, if you always want to make your other half the person you want, just like this friend of mine, he clearly has the need for a “dog”, but he has to compete with cats.
In this world, the only person that everyone can change is themselves. When you try to change other people and make them do what you want, either you want to control yourself, or the reality is seriously inconsistent with your ideal.
Either of these two situations is not conducive to the establishment of a healthy marriage relationship.
overly sensitive person
If a person is too sensitive, it means that the person has a serious inferiority complex. He always thinks others are belittling him and attacking him. So he is always in a defensive state, which is actually a lack of security.
A girl complained that she was walking down the street with her boyfriend and all the women were beating her boyfriend’s mind.
So someone asked her why she felt that way. She replied: “Because the women who looked at him had bad intentions in their eyes.”
The man asked her again, but there were still some women who didn’t look at him? And the woman replied, “That’s because they didn’t dare to look at it, and there was a ghost in their hearts.”
People who are extremely uneasy like this will naturally find it difficult to provide a healthy intimacy and the most important sense of trust in a marriage.
dating someone who is always late
Some say it’s too common to be late and that’s no big deal. But I’m talking about “always” love being late. When a man is always late every time he makes an appointment with you, it reveals the man’s heart, hesitancy and attitude towards this relationship.
When a man is faced with an event, instead of taking action directly, hesitation, anxiety and procrastination are actually all the person is subconsciously bypassing and avoiding action.
In the process of psychological counseling, the lateness behavior of the client is actually a resistance to the counselor and the consultation. This lateness behavior also needs to be the work content of the counselor and the client.
A man who is always late for your appointments must have a particularly punctual time in his life. For example, his favorite team has a game on the air today, so he must have been waiting in front of the TV early.
Another example is that his favorite limited edition sneakers are on sale today, so he must have gone to the store early to line up.
So being late is just an appearance. Hesitating, casual, and not paying enough attention to this relationship is the deepest reason.
have old friends
You can look at a man to see if he has an old friend who has been with him for a long time. If his friendship is always short-lived, and a friend breaks up after a long time, then you have to consider it carefully.
When a person’s friends always come back and forth, but there is no long-term friend, it means that the person’s ability to live in harmony and cooperate with others is not good.
And marriage is also a relationship of cooperation and coexistence. It also requires two people to be able to tolerate each other when they are together, and to be able to give the same when they are given by others.
So don’t look at how good a man is to you when you are in a relationship. As long as this man is essentially unable to coordinate with others, his kindness to anyone cannot last for a long time.
A pessimistic person always looks at the world negatively and cannot feel the sunshine and warmth.
I once saw a story about a man who had a cold and complained to him: “My neighbor’s dog must know that I am sick these two days, so he kept barking and deliberately prevented me from resting. .”
Then someone said, didn’t his master send you a bowl of hot noodle soup? So the man added: “This bowl of noodle soup may not even be eaten by their dog, so I thought of sending it to me.”
The person in this story is a typical pessimistic person who holds a skeptical and disdainful attitude towards the world. So this kind of person, the life he feels must be full of malice and unhappiness.
More importantly, when he faces the problems of life, he will choose to retreat because he is too pessimistic and negative, and lack the courage to face the problems.
Marriage is a sacred and prudent thing. Only by grasping your own happiness and opening your eyes can you be happy and fulfilled. Of course, a happy marriage is not only about choosing a partner, but knowing the correct way of doing business is also crucial.
In the book “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work” written by the Pope of Marriage, the master of interpersonal relationships, and the famous psychologist John Gottman, it is written in detail how to properly manage, maintain, and improve a beautiful marriage relationship. .
Although the name of the book is “The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work“, this book is worth reading for both married and unmarried people. It can teach us how to better communicate and get along with the other half, and how to be more Good to maintain an intimate relationship, and how to better benefit from an intimate relationship.
If you still don’t know how to get along and maintain a relationship with your significant other in intimacy and marriage, then you must read this book