Some girls always struggle over and over again on one issue, tossing and turning, that is – “He really love me or not?”

Is the answer to this question really so difficult? In fact, not necessarily, sometimes, it is just because we are in it that the authorities are obsessed.

Try to get out of the way and observe and analyze with a calm mind, and the answer will be obvious.

Today I will teach you a very useful chat self-examination technique to test how much a man loves you.

As long as you analyze your chat records, you can clearly know whether he loves you or not?

01

round-robin chat

If you’re chatting with a guy, always be positive and respond quickly to his messages. But it always takes a long time for him to reply to you, sometimes even after several days.

Then this is a typical “negative” chat – you reply to his message in seconds, and he replies to your message after in days.it means that he doesn’t interest on you.

Of course, everyone is busy, especially if a guy is very good, then he may devote a lot of time to study and career, so it is inevitable that sometimes when you send him a message, he will reply Slow down.

But if he always delays for a long time every time he responds to your message, and sometimes even reply to you after a day or two, then undoubtedly, his investment in you is very limited, then the degree of his love for you is also limited. 

Be careful, it doesn’t mean that a guy doesn’t love you if he responds slowly to your message. Don’t be like some girls. If a guy doesn’t reply to himself after ten minutes or an hour or two, he will be in all kinds of entanglements. All kinds of doubts that boys do not love themselves.

What I’m talking about is that boys don’t reply to you for a long time, sometimes even a day or two, and this frequency of replying has become the norm. This is a sign that boys don’t love you.

02

A thousand years to wait for a chat

In addition to the length of time a guy responds to your messages, the frequency with which he contacts you is also an important indicator of whether he loves you.

If you chat with a guy, you start a topic, and every time you talk to him, he responds to you.

And the number of times he takes the initiative to chat with you is very small, it is simply “wait for a thousand years”, then he must not love you enough.

So, take out your phone, look through your chat history with him, check the date, and see if the person who opens the conversation is always you?

Under normal circumstances, it should be almost half and half of two people. Even if a boy likes you more and you are in a high position in the relationship, it should be the boy who takes the initiative more often.

So, to see if a boy doesn’t love you, just see if he is always chatting with you in an interactive way of “waiting for a thousand years”.

03

Cherish words like gold

There are also some boys who always cherish words when chatting with girls, as if saying one more word will kill them.

This type of boy generally has three behaviors when chatting with girls:

short opening remarks

Every time I take the initiative to find you, the words are always super short, either “Are you there?” .

Boys like this are generally likely to cast a wide net. Maybe when he sent you this message, he also sent it to many other girls, just to see who was interested in him and who would put more value in him.

If he meets a girl who is more interested in him and returns to him, then he will naturally be more willing to chat with that girl, and will naturally ignore you.

You send a “small composition” but he replies with “keywords”

There are other guys, although he doesn’t “cast a wide net” and treat you like a fish. But in the process of chatting, the level of slackness is also unbearable.

You chatted with him excitedly and sent him a long message, which was almost as long as a “small composition”. But when he replied to you, it was only two or three words, just like keywords.

Some people say that the number of words a person replies to you is proportional to his love for you. In fact, sometimes this sentence is not unreasonable.

Emoji pack perfunctory reply

There is another kind of reply, even if he doesn’t bother to type hyphens, no matter what you say to him, he will reply you with an emoji.

You told him something happened today that made you feel so sad, and he replied you with a emoji.

You tell him that the weather is getting colder, remember to add clothes, and he will reply with emoji again.

For him, expressions are everything, because he finds it troublesome to type a word for you. You ask how much he loves you? Then you count the number of words he replies to you.

04

Like the  cold king

There is also a kind of boy who replies to you in a timely manner and doesn’t use emojis to perfunctory you, but he always embarrassed the scene when you chat with him, and is often cold.

Obviously every time you open a particularly good chat topic, but he always refuses to answer, and often use few words to end the chats within second.

You look at his circle of friends and know that he has gone abroad recently, and then you tell him, how is the journey? I’ve been to XX place too. It’s very fun and the food is very delicious. Have you been there?

Then he replies to you: Mmmm, okay. Didn’t go.

You know he also likes some star very much, and also went to concerts. So you said to him: Wow, you went to the concert too? I went too that day!

He will say to you: Oh, nice.

These replies can feel a cool wind blowing across the screen, making people feel a cool feeling.

Yes, don’t doubt, the reason why he can’t talk so much is just because he doesn’t like you.

There is a saying that is good, it depends on whether a person loves you, not what he said, but what he did for you.

But if a person is unwilling to invest even in the value of “speaking”, and he is slack and perfunctory even in speaking, then what do you expect him to do for you?

Babies, when you meet such a boy, please stop worrying and entanglement.

Since it is obvious that he is so uninterested in you, why should we lose our dignity to beg and wag our tails.

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A lot of times, I always hear some girls complain that their boyfriends have some shortcomings that really make them unbearable.Some say that their boyfriend has never been sloppy, and is simply a technical nerd. Some people say that their boyfriend doesn’t understand amorous feelings at all, and is completely a straight male.Others say that their boyfriend neither understands romance, but also lives a decadent life, and is properly a greasy man.They have tried many methods, but the boys are still unmoved, and there is no substantial change in action. What do they have to do so that boys can be obedient and make changes for them?

In fact, it is not that difficult to want a boy to be willing to make changes for you. Just like meeting a cat with a stubborn personality, as long as you find its cool point correctly, it will obediently let you stroke it.If you want a boy to change for you willingly, you must first understand the following points:

01 encourage

When we train the dog, As the dog makes a corresponding action according to your instructions, we usually reward it, so that the dog will form a conditioned reflex in the long run and be more willing to make the action.

Humans are actually the same as animals. Once he does something, he will be rewarded, so he will definitely be happy to repeat this action, which is learned behavior through reinforcement.

So when a boy does the behavior you want him to do, even if it’s just an occasional one or two, you should know how to encourage and praise him in time.

For example, he has always been a steely straight male who doesn’t understand the style, and even takes the initiative to call you and rarely speaks. But  one night he suddenly took the initiative to call you.

Then at this time, you must not be very surprised and complain that he has not taken the initiative to call you before.

Instead, you should say to him: I feel so happy every time I hear your voice, and I love the feeling of hearing you say goodnight to me in person before going to bed.

In this way, boys will be more willing to speak or call you more often.

02 bottom line

If you want a guy to make a change, you have to let him know where your bottom line is.

If no matter what he looks like or what he does, you look like you can bear it completely, then he will have no psychological pressure at all and no motivation to change at all.

But, on the contrary, if you can let him know where your bottom line is, then he knows he needs to perform better or risk losing you.

03 express needs

Sometimes, it’s not that the guy is unwilling to make changes for you, it’s that you never express your needs to him.

It’s like a paragraph on TikTok :

“

Girl: You don’t understand me at all

Boy: How can I understand you if you don’t tell me

Girl: The real understanding does not need to be said

Boy: I don’t understand what you said

Girl: What’s the point of saying it, I don’t say it, you should understand

Boy: I’m not you, how can I know your feelings completely

Girl: I don’t care

“

Although this is just a joke, it is indeed a state that often occurs when men and women get along.

Girls are shy about expressing their thoughts and expect boys to understand in seconds. But most straight men say that it is really difficult for them to do this. They can’t do it at all.

So sometimes, such a state can cause a lot of misunderstandings. It’s not that the guy doesn’t want to make changes for you, it’s that he doesn’t know what changes he needs to make.

So it’s important to communicate with a guy and let him know what changes you want him to make.

04 good attitude

As we mentioned earlier, if you want boys to make changes for you, communication is actually very important. So how to communicate, will achieve a good effect? The answer is: good attitude.

When you express your needs and hope that boys make changes, you must not criticize and blame like parents educate their children. This will not only fail to achieve the purpose, but sometimes even have the opposite effect.

In addition, when communicating, you should avoid these two sensitive words as much as possible: always and never.

For example, when some girls quarrel with boys, they will say: You are always like this, every time you talk is not counted… You will never change, you have never done anything for me… ··

You know, the emotions expressed by these two words are very extreme. This is a violent way of communication that will only fill your relationship with accusations, complaints and blows.

05 lead by example

Many times, we want others to make changes. First of all, you must take the initiative to make changes, so that you can lead and infect the people around you.

For example, you complain about boys, a decadent life, a greasy body, and an unhealthy lifestyle. Instead of urging him to get rid of these bad habits in his ear every day, it is better to be yourself first.

Go out and participate in meaningful social activities, go to the gym regularly every day, and refuse those unhealthy junk food.

In this way, in the long run, when he sees your change, he will definitely be inspired by you and take the initiative to try to make changes.

In short, if you want a boy to communicate with you more, you should first communicate with him proactively. If you want a boy to care more about you, then you should try to care more about him first, and use your actions to drive it. He, of course, would be more willing to make changes.

06 No one is perfect

Although, above we talked about a lot of techniques to make guys willing to make changes for you. But we must be clear that no one is perfect, and no one is perfect.

Maybe this boy has one or another shortcomings, but unless it is some serious or principled issues, we can all be as tolerant as possible.

True love is not only loving the other person’s strengths, but even small shortcomings can become the reason for you to love him.

As long as you’re sure he’s a reliable man and the right person you really want to be with, try to accept some of his small shortcomings as well.

Two people in love are like turning two gears of friction, and finding the best state of getting along between you will make love more beautiful.

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For other purposes that you don’t want to experience

Love means different things for different people for each age group.When we are young, we yearn for vigor and vitality. By middle age, we want stability. Women all want to be loved and to be pursued, but in middle age, things are different. Maybe you already have a family.  You think that he really loves you, but a lot of the time he doesn’t. He might just be trying to take advantage of you, or he more likely that he is just looking for novelty, and then he will go his own way. When you reach middle age, you can no longer treat your suitors as willfully as you did when you were young. You need to discern what he means to you and how you should handle this relationship so that you don’t get hurt. In fact, when women reach middle age, they still pursue the opposite sex, mostly for these purposes.

To experience the freshness

Love is not a game of deceit, but some men like to seek their own interests under the guise of love. Such men take the initiative to approach middle-aged women, and even show great hospitality to them, mostly for the word “interest”, and women have to guard against them. Love is only a part of life. We can fully enjoy the happiness brought by love, but at the same time we need to be alert to the traps in it, so as not to let ourselves fall into it. Love someone, please love them deeply, and don’t waste other people’s feelings and let yourself become a liar. I have seen many such cases in my life. A man approaching a middle-aged woman appears to be because of love, but in fact it is because the other party’s economic conditions are good, such as a few properties, huge savings, and so on. When the man saw this, he pretended to approach her, and when the time was right, he slowly revealed his ambition, either letting the property transfer or trying to move her money. Such a person has a very clear purpose, and such feelings are more hypocritical than we imagine. Only by knowing how to distinguish can we distinguish what is true love and what is playing and exploiting.

Due to the pressure of parents, Want to find a suitable marriage partner as soon as possible

It seems that once entering the society, people will face three kinds of pressures: the pressure of finding a job, getting married, and having children. Pressure always exists around people all the time. If you have just graduated, your family will ask you to find a job, and you will face pressure to find a job; if your job is stable and your age is marriageable , then your family will urge you to go on a blind date, get married, and the pressure of marriage begins to approach you again; if you are already married, your family may urge you to have a child while you are young again, and you will face such pressure to have a child again. These pressures will always subtly make people feel coercive and unpleasant, and these pressures can crush people in all aspects. So when a middle-aged unmarried man is still flirting with you, and often takes the initiative to care about you, you have to evaluate and think seriously, whether he really loves you , or is it just old age, it’s time to get married, find someone who is suitable for marriage. Both of these are very important, because no one can withstand the pressure of family marriage all the time, and then convince himself that he can’t do it in his life. No, everyone will compromise with reality. Everyone is an ordinary person, an ordinary person who cannot shoulder the responsibilities of a hero. It is difficult to take care of yourself under the pressure of this society. If you still need to take care of yourself. One’s own love, taking care of the perfect pursuit of love in one’s heart, is too tiring for an adult. It is easy to find a suitable person for marriage, but true love and sincere affection are too hard to find. If a man is still unmarried in middle age and takes the initiative to flirt with you, then he may not really love you, but in addition to loving you, there are many things that may urge him to do it.

Emotional suggest: When a woman reaches the stage of forty or fifty years old, don’t be blinded by a man’s temporary love, otherwise the consequences will be disastrous. If you say that you already have a stable marriage, you naturally have to reject the pursuit of other opposite sex, because once you are tempted, you will definitely pay the price; if you are single, you should also get to know each other comprehensively. If something is wrong, you have to turn away immediately. In the face of love, don’t be blindly impulsive. Sometimes you look at it like love, but it is actually a hurt. Don’t be fooled and fooled. In any case, stay away from divorce, keep yourself awake, and don’t be deceived by men’s rhetoric. Only in this way can you reap a lifetime of happiness.

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